WTH?

WHAT. THE. HECK.

Although, to be perfectly honest, I wasn't really thinking heck when I first caught eye on my darling daughter's new do.

Pictures can say a thousand words, but unfortunately, although a picture has been taken, the USB cord is not working correctly and I can't download them to the computer. Erg. Lucky for you, I am a master of words. *Ha, ha, ha, cough, cough, blech* (Sorry, I started choking in my sarcastic laughter). I will however, attempt to describe the beauty that currently is sitting on our "throne".

(Lest you think we are royalty--as I'm sure that was your first thought--we're potty training.)

(The potty-training is endless.)

(But I digress. Back to our regularly-scheduled post.)

Think of pretty little Megs, with her light blond hair, cute bangs and scraggly hair that's been determinedly pulled out of whatever pony/pig/animal tail that I attempted this morning and is now streaming behind her as she runs around my house wrecking havoc whenever her attention is caught. Check out the pics in the side column or previous posts if needed.

NOW, imagine that same impish face. Imagine those bangs cut to about 1/4 of an inch on the right side of her face, to about 3/4 of an inch on the left. With big gouges of jaggedy steps in between. THEN, imagine nice chunks of hair cut in random around her noggin. Thankfully, no bald spots. Luckily I was planning on taking her to get her hair cut into a bob anyways...

...we're just going to make that appointment for tomorrow.

Poops & Peeters

(I know. I figured if I was gonna come back with a post after months of nothing, I'd better have a good title. Made you look, didn't it?)

Do any of you watch PBS, with or without your kids? There are some good shows. We love Curious George, Arthur, and Cyberchase. Meg could watch Word World pretty much all day with Super Why! a close second in her book.

But the show that all four of my kids watch, even Bryson, is Dinosaur Train. They love learning about dinosaurs and they LOVE all the songs. But there is one song....that quite frankly disturbs me as much as it amuses me.

Every Dinosaur Poops.

I tried to embed the video but that just didn't work. Take a second and go to the link to watch it. If your children love Dinosaur Train, well then I'm sure you've already been exposed to the joys of pooping dinosaurs. Whenever this episode airs, I have Megs & Garrett singing this song for days. DAYS!

But that is not the worst song my children sing. Ohhhh no. Another song that my children love (thanks Grandpa Felkins) is one that they learned while camping this summer. I'm sure you've heard it but tried to block it out if you are a woman. And if you are a man? Well, then I'm sure you'll be glad Grandpa decided to impart his wisdom on my kids. And please teach the same to your kids, cuz I don't want to have the only inappropriate children out there, K?

Oh, the song. You pry want to know (and by want, I mean cringing in fear) what song I'm even talking about. Here goes. "There's a skeeter on my peeter."

Yup.

WILDLY inappropriate.

And yet, strangely hilarious when you hear your children and their cousins singing it at the top of their lungs in the middle of the mountains. If you do not know the words, ask your hubby. OR, I'll just tell you. Cuz hey, if my kids can be inappropriate, so can I.

Ahem.

"There's a skeeter on my peeter, flick it off....
There's a skeeter on my peeter flick it off...
There's a skeeter on my peeter, there's a skeeter on my peeter,
There's a skeeter on my peeter, flick it off!"

Simplistic really, and yet it will provide you with miles of laughter and humiliation. Especially when your kids start singing it in the camp section of Walmart two weeks later.

You're welcome.

Seriously?

Just thought I'd freak all of you out by actually putting in a teensy tiny little post with our latest happenings.

We're alive.

Megan Gets Religious

The Sunday after Christmas our ward did another Christmas-like program (they did one the prior week as well) with lots of music and short talks. I LOVE Christmas programs. They are interesting, they move along, and with all the music it just helps the Spirit out.

A Brother visiting our ward gets up for his talk. He is tall, probably in his 40's, has dark longish hair, and a beard. We are sitting in the front row on the side because the chapel was packed with people. Megan sees our next speaker, stands up on my lap, and yells, "MOM! It's JESUS!"

The Brother (I cannot for the life of me remember his name) looks over at us and says, "Well, not quite little lady, but thanks," and proceeds on with his talk. The whole chapel is cracking up. I am shushing Megs and trying to get her to settle down but she just keeps stage-whispering, "Jesus, Mommy. JESUS. It's JESUS!" Finally I had to take her out into the foyer so everyone could listen to the speaker instead of my daughter.

While I am very happy that she is aware of Jesus, perhaps we should focus a tad more on the stories in the Bible rather than pictures, so she doesn't think every man with a beard is Jesus, don't ya think?

Good times.

Pictures!

Can you believe it? For the first time in, oh about four years, we actually got family pictures taken! Yay!! My friend Emily Bailey took them (check out her blog www.emilybaileyphotography.blogspot.com) and did a fantastic job of catching my kids' personalities.

And yes, I am well aware that I have been a bad, bad blogger. So sue me. I needed a break for a bit...and yes, I still hit Facebook everyday (cuz it's fast, fun, and I'm addicted, ok??) but one of my New Year's resolutions is to blog more consistently-ish. At least monthly and hopefully more than that.

Also, we took tons of pics at Christmas and Halloween and all that jazz, but our camera won't download them to the computer. So here's a sum-up. We had Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas. It was fun. We played a lot, spent a lot, and ate a lot. Best holidays of 2009, maybe even 2005-2008 as well because no one was sick. If my camera stops throwing a hissy fit we'll download some pictures. Otherwise, use your imagination, cuz I got nothin'.

Wait!!

Wait...I do have a story. I know you all looove my stories. And if not, well, it'd just be rude to stop reading now. So, Christmas Eve. Beautiful, freezing cold, nothing in particular to do during the day other than prepare for Christmas, so my hubby gets spontaneous (which is rather rare so be proud of him) and we decide to take the kids to go see "Chipmunks: the Squeakquel" or however you spell it. I don't want to go check, so if you want to go check the spelling, lemmeno and I'll change it if it's wrong. (sarcasm is my friend today in case you weren't aware).

Anyway. Grabbed the kiddles and off we went. As we are pulling into the parking lot we decide that after the movie we are going to stop at Costco to get some cheap gas (cuz it's right across the street) so we're all set for the next day of driving around visiting all the fam. Do you sense the foreshadowing here? Get inside the movie theater where we spend a fortune on tickets and snacks, cuz hey, it's Christmas, and the kids LOVED the movie. Imagine an amazing movie that could possibly win an Oscar because of the specatular effects, acting and musical score. That would be the complete opposite of this movie. (It was kinda funny, there was more music than the first movie, but the dancing? Good grief. Once was pry good enough for me.)

After the movie we go out to the van and lo, and behold, the van doesn't start. Errggg....after an hour of trying to get gas, jumping the car, having everybody who walks by us offer to help (which was so incredible it makes me believe that the spirit of Christmas is alive and well), we finally called to get some family to come help us out. Needless to say, I'm filling up the van with gas every week regardless of how many miles have been driven. :)

Really not my best story but it's all I've got today. Merry belated Christmas and Happy New Year!

Cub Scouts (aka I have NO idea what I'm doing)

WOW.

I've been called as the Wolf den leader for Cub Scouts. I am excited to learn more about the scouting program, but honestly, I have absolutely no idea what I'm doing. Bryson has been in Scouts for almost a year, but with moving and this new ward not keeping on top of weekly activities and badges (and us as parents not keeping up on it either), I still feel like I have no clue as to what it all entails. However, they have put in all new leaders and a new cubmaster who is very gung-ho and excited to be involved and get the boys on their way, so I think it's going to be great. Needless to say, I will be learning alot and plan on picking everybody's brain who has had anything to do with it (i.e. my dad, my brother, Mary Ann--you're still a den leader, right?, and anybody else who can help me out). Feel free to give me lots of advice and ideas. LOTS.

Evil

I was hiding from my son today. In the kitchen. And not hiding exactly, just not answering when he was calling for me while I was clearing the table after dinner, which is really more like pretending to be invisible and not hiding at all. Anyway, Bryson comes around the corner and says, "There you are! Why didn't you answer when I called for you?" I smirked, and just as I was about to respond...

Abby says, "Cuz she's evil."

You better believe it.

Mwa ha ha ha!

Mating

Yup. Read that title again cuz that's what we are talking about tonight people, MATING.

Apparently, my dear sweet husband informed Bryson that he could always watch the Discovery Channel. Educational, thought-provoking, science-oriented. And while yes, I could see how this thought process might work--if it was Discovery KIDS Channel--I am a tad disturbed that this wasn't discussed with me prior to the following conversation. At leat then I would have been prepared. Sigh. Can you see what is coming?? Can you feel the dread that still sinks into my chest even while typing this? Ayiyiyi...

Bryson: Mom. Did you know that tree frogs mate?

Me: Yep (keep it short, sweet and hopefully he'll leave....)

Bryson: Do you know what mating is?

Me: Yep (go away...go away)

Bryson: That's how they get babies, huh.

Me: (cornered in the hall by my 8 year old child) That's right. Where did you learn this?

Bryson: The Discovery Channel. Dad said I can watch it.

Me: Great.

Bryson: Do people mate?

Me: ummm...yep

Bryson: To get babies?

Me: Uh huh.

Bryson: Hmm...do people mate the same way that tree frogs do?

Me: (What the heck?! How am I supposed to answer this? Think...no, RUN! RUN AWAY!)
Well... (don't say it..walk away, walk away)
How do tree frogs mate? (IDIOT)

Bryson: On top of each other.

Me: (choking) Hmm. Well. Uh, Bryson this is one of those adult things that you don't need to learn about quite yet.

Bryson: But I want to know.

Me: Yeah, but you can't because you are only eight. Remember how Megan wants to read books but she can't read them yet cuz she doesn't know her letters and stuff? She has to wait until she gets bigger and learns other things first. When you get bigger then you can learn this other kind of stuff too. (What a nice motherly moment for me, I feel like that swelling music from TV should start playing...)

Bryson: Ok. I'll just ask Dad later.

Me: Great.

New York Cousins

My newest nephew, Luke. He started smiling while I was out there, of course, because he loves his favorite Aunt Jen. :) SO cute. I just wanted to hold him the whole trip. Which I did.

The very energetic and hilarious Tyler. He is two, just a couple of months older than Megan, but is much taller. He didn't know what to think of me at first, but he warmed up and we had lots of fun. His giggle is very infectious, loves to watch movies on the computer and drink "choc'late milk."

Ben (7) and Kenzie (almost 5 in these pics). I had lots of fun talking about books with Ben--he is a HUGE reader--and Kenzie would crack me up with all of her songs and poses, both of which she does all. the. time. She sings everything which drives Ben crazy. And when I say everything, I do mean EVERYTHING from what she is picking up off the floor, to what the kids are doing, to just random noise. It was hilarious to listen to.

At the Children's Museum in Syracuse. Gross (which is what he was going for I think) but very funny.

New York Palmyra Pictures

Entertaining ourselves in the backseat on our way to the Hill Cumorah pageant.

(McKenzie, Ben & me)

At Hill Cumorah. They have a huge stage (all the stone steps) that is set up on the hill and looks like it's been there forever even though they put it up and tear it down each summer. It was amazing the number of people who come--regardless of religion--and from how far. Before the pageant starts, all the actors and a zillion missionaries walk around handing out Books of Mormon and pass along cards and talking to the audience.

With it being so dark and my dinky little camera, it was difficult to get any good pictures of the actual Pageant. Besides the fact that my flash going off irritated all those around me. Oops!

But this is a scene of Lehi's dream with the Tree of Life. The special effects they use are amazing, there's water, fire, besides just lighting. And everytime Jesus was part of it, my cute little nephew Tyler would yell out "JESUS!" and "ooohhhh" and "ahhhh". Very entertaining.

Later that week we went back to Hill Cumorah and Palymra to check things out in the daylight.

Monument at Hill Cumorah

Palmyra Temple seen from Joseph Smith's farmhouse.


Palmyra Temple up close.

Pathway from Smith home to Sacred Grove.

Smith's farmhouse (where Joseph Smith grew up)


Probably my favorite picture of the entire trip (and I actually took it with my dinky point and shoot camera). I absolutely love the lighting and the trees.

The Sacred Grove

Niagara Falls (pics, pics oh and wait..more pics)

Niagara (pronounced NI-ah-guh-ruh as we were told many times throughout the tours) from the view tower:

Our beautiful scraggly selves, in beautiful blue trash bag ponchos, after the Maid of the Mist tour where you ride in a ferry around the bottom of the Falls. Pretty cool.

These next two were taken while on the ferry ride. All the mist coming off the Falls could be seen miles away--from the freeway it looks like smoke billowing up from a gigantic fire.

Rainbow Bridge that crosses over to Canada. Sooooo close to going international.






Absolutely soaking wet after doing the tour where you walk at the bottom of the Falls on a deck and can actually touch them. Very cool--amazing power from the Falls. They waves crashing onto the deck would push me and my sis Melissa across the deck a bit. It was awesome.

Those crazy people in yellow? That's the Tour at the bottom of the falls. Freakin' awesome.

Me in front of Canada. :)

Melissa in front of Canada.

The amazing and kind of awful truck/limo we saw coming home.

Summer Confusion

The weather lately has been difficult for my children. I LOVE the rain. I could live in Seattle (oooo, or FORKS...hello Edward...) cuz rain is fun for me. However, with the first two weeks of summer vacation for my kids being doused in rain, times have not been perfectly enjoyable over here, because they have been trapped inside our house for the most part. This week however, it has been beautiful!! The sun is shining, we started swimming lessons, played at the park, had picnics, ride bikes, all things summer.

So this afternoon as I'm listening to my children run all over the house, screeching like banshees, I tell them to go play outside (where their screeching doesn't make me want to eat a whole bottle of ibuprofen and wash it down with a bottle of something stronger than Pepsi). Do my children dash outside to play in the sun ready to jump and frolic? No. I have a mutiny. They don't want to go outside, they don't want to play.

Whatever, I think and I send them outside. Surely they will get out there and start messing around and have some fun so I can make dinner.

They sit on the stairs, with their arms folded, bottom lips sticking out, anger lurking in their eyes. What?!? So I give them a choice. They can play outside, in the sunshine, ride their bikes, play in the yard, whatever! OR, they can come in and clean their rooms.

The results:
Their rooms have never looked so clean.

Abby's New 'Do

Abby's hair has been growing uncontrollably, and since the poor girl was bald until she was two, we've had a difficult time wanting to cut it. Actually, Bryson has shown no such restraint as he cut it twice when she was two, thus delaying hair growth even longer! Obviously you can understand our hesitancy in cutting our dear Abby-girl's hair. Unfortunately, the hair had overtaken the girl and I finally convinced her to get it cut for summer. We love being able to do fun things with her hair, but the tangles and heat, not to mention the crying when we tried to comb her long hair, well, it was time.

BEFORE

Abby was very willing to tell the hair stylist EXACTLY what she wanted, which was very cute, and expressed her interest in having bangs. I think the stylist was a little suprised I was willing to cut off a good 6-8 inches of hair on the whim of an almost six year old, but she was willing, especially when Abby said she wanted bangs just like the stylist's cuz they were so pretty. :) My charmer--turns those big brown eyes on people and you just can't help but succumb.

AFTER

Needless to say, we love her hair!! So much easier to do in the morning, plus it just suits her sweet personality. And of course we had to put the whole picture thing on the blog because, as Abby informed me, people just want to KNOW. Now you're in the know. Your welcome.

Graduating Kindergarten

I've just been on a blogging roll the last few days! This will be my 3rd post in as many days, and I'm pretty sure a blogging medal should be handed over. I'm all over patting myself on the back. My house may not be perfectly clean but Facebook status and blogging is up to date!!

ANYWAY. Like many of you with kindergarteners, we had a graduation program to go to. My firstborn didn't have one when he was in kindergarten. I feel slightly gyped. Ok not really. But Abby's class had a short one along with a singing program which was just cute and hilarious.

Here's Abby realizing I've pulled the camera out to take pictures.


Completely enthralled by their sweet teacher, Miss Tensmeyer.

For every song the class sang, between 3-5 of the children would get up and act out the song. Abby got to act as a rosebush (perfect for my pretty and shy girl) for a song about a puppy that sniffs a rose and gets stung by a bee on his nose. Very cute.

Again, realizing that I'm taking a picture. :)

After the singing portion, Miss Tensmeyer, that is her on the right handside in the white dress, passed out the graduation certificates. She is very petite and makes all the kindergarteners look huge. I'm not exactly a tall person by any stretch of the imagination, but she is a good five or six inches shorter than I am. She comes to just past my shoulder. I really need to hang around her more--not only is she an incredible teacher, but one of the few people on this earth older than 12 that I am taller than. FABULOUS.

So, Abby got her certificate and didn't even look at the camera. She looks like she's stalking away, but really, it was more like a graceful glide. She gets that from me, as I am amazingly graceful (just ask my family). *smirk* :) Abby also won the citizenship certificate for the top girl in her class that befriends and is kind to any and all. Yay for Abby-girl!

I can't hardly believe she's out of kindergarten and my kids are home for the summer. I love them being home--hopefully we won't all be driving each other crazy by next week. :) Next stop, FIRST GRADE!

Underwears

I'm sitting at the computer, playing on Facebook (because for the life of me, I just can't keep myself away when I'm bored), when Meg walks in wearing:

Yup. Garrett's new soccer underwear. She found a pair downstairs in his drawer and managed to get them on, over her capris, backwards, all by her smart little self.

She refused to take them off. Ever. In fact, she is still wearing them. Just kidding, cuz that would be seriously gross as this was last Tuesday. But let me tell you, it took the bribe of a bubble bath AND a treat that night in order for her to willingly take them off and exchange them for pj's. However, what particularly cracked me up was that she kept hitching up her red shirt in order to show me "Raret's" underwear. She was incredibly proud, and aren't we all? Look, my baby is dressing herself. Perhaps not her own clothing, and backwards, and ok, wrong gender really, and to be perfectly picky not in the correct order and all, but she's dressing herself. She's a genius.

I'm totally taking this as a sign that potty training is going to be a breeze. Not that I plan on doing that any time soon, but underwear? Before two? Come on people, that's just brilliance waiting to be bragged upon.

Our First Pinewood Derby

I'm a little late with this one as it happend a month ago, but we couldn't leave this out as it is a fun part of scouts. Bryson and Travis built their first pinewood derby car this year and had lots of fun racing and trying to beat the other boys.

Bryson is a tad bit obsessed with killer whales (he plans to work in Sea World when he gets older, and in case you are thinking this is a passing fancy, this has been his plan since kindergarten) so that's the colors they chose for their awesome car. :)

I had never been to a Pinewood derby before, somehow missed my brother's when he was in scouts by prolly working at good old Shopko or something, but it just cracked me up to watch the boys. I don't think they really cared who won, but they loved to trashtalk about it. As did the dads which was just as funny. They just had fun racing them down, over and over and over. And my younger kids LOVED to watch.

A more correct Ode

Fine. One of you readers, and I will not name names, but her initials are Laura Kay Beesley Ferguson, called me out on my Ode. She is correct, it wasn't really an ode, more a rambling of my current fetish with our central air. In retaliation, I have indeed written a more correct ode (I was an English major after all, might as well get some use out of it). It amused me while I sat in front of a fabulously cold air vent and killed some time while the kids watched "The Bee Movie". Here are the results of my boredom (because why would I use said quiet time for cleaning? That would be ridiculous and more to the point, less annoying to all of you, my public). If you do not appreciate my poetry, well, tough. You should know by now that I am a firm believer in writing the random.

Ode to Central Air
Do not let it be said,
that I can not write a rhyme
I am not ill-read
was just pressed for time.
However it seems that I must confess
My ode to central air was not,
Merely some prose I used to brag.
But now is the time I truly am blessed
For my rhyming skills aren't shot
My ode is in the bag.

Oh beautiful Air
cold, crisp and soothing
the way it flutters my hair
just simply by moving.
I will not deny I hate being overheated
so this central air invention
is my one true summer delight.
My hair, which right now, is not being treated,
and all of my summer intentions
freeze in the air, which is quite alright.

I love you, I love you
It's true, not a line
Central Air BTU's
Give me shivers up my spine.
The heat you diminish
No sweat pouring down to my seat
No swollen doors, no musty reek.
And now I can finish
with my Ode now complete
No longer a slacker, but seriously, a geek.

MORE than kissing

Kids.

So I'm driving the kids over to Travis' work to switch off so I can go work for my dad on Friday and I'm listening to my kiddles chat in the back of the van. Their conversations generally amuse me because they seem so random. Here's one fun conversation.

Abby: I don't like kissing.

Bryson: Kissing is gross.

Garrett: Kissing is for girls.

Abby: Kissing is only if you get married. I don't want to get married cuz then I'll have to kiss a BOY.

Bryson: You can kiss your girlfriends and boyfriends too. Right mom?

Mom: Yes, when you are much much older, almost as old as me, then you can kiss your girlfriend or boyfriend.

Abby: Mom, I'm going to have a boyfriend when I'm six.

Mom: Well, you're not kissing your boyfriend when you're six or I'm talking to your boyfriend's mother.

Bryson: Married people like to kiss, huh mom.

Mom: Yes, married people usually like to kiss.

Abby: Why? That's so gross. Like when dad kisses you it make me want to throw up.

Garrett: Frowing up is gross! I don't like to frow up. Makes gagging noises.

Abby: Kissing is really gross.

Bryson: You have to kiss when you get married.

Garrett continuing to make gagging noises to sound like he's "frowing up".

Abby: Why?

Bryson: You have to kiss. And sometimes married people do more than kiss.

Mom (after narrowly missing a pedestrian walking on his own yard): What do you mean they do "more"?

Bryson: You know, they do more. They kiss...and then...

Mom (panicking): Yes??

Complete silence in the car--the first time that has happened in about a year--while they all listen.

Bryson: And then they have babies.

Mom: YUP. That's exactly what happens when you're married. What sounds good for dinner??

Ode to Central Air

I don't think I'm living in the correct region for my temperature needs. I LOVE autumn. In fact, in my perfect world, it is autumn for about six months of the year. I LOVE spring (unless it's snowing, cuz that really isn't spring, that's just annoying winter trying to nose its way back). I LOVE snow for about a six weeks from Thanksgiving to New Years. And I love summer...wait a second. I don't really love summer. I love the things you can do in the summer, such as watching the kids swim, camping, county fairs, rodeos, vacation from school, eat scrumptious food like corn on the cob, melons of all sorts, apples, BBQ, etc. The hot temperatures of Utah in July and August? Can everybody say three digits? Not really a fan, no. Why do I live in Utah? Ohh yeah, that crazy little thing called family. Actually, I love Utah, I just find its weather a little too extreme for me. (although it does give me something to whine about on a fairly regular basis, so there is that)

But guess what.

This year, we will experience, for the first time in our married lives, right in our very own home, and it works and everything cuz I've been using it today until I have frozen everybody else, ahhh...central air.

What a miraculous thing! I get cold air...in my house! Not just my refrigerator! Yes, yes, it could cost me a pretty penny if I get a little overzealous with it which will prolly happen cuz I love being cold when it's hot outside. Kind of like winter, when I love being warm in my bed while the air around me is cold. I'm a girl of contradictions. Strange, but true. And I am obviously going on way too many tangents today which is so not like my regular self *cough cough*.

Ahem. Moving on, er, well, back.

I can sit on my couch in the livingroom and not make a puddle wherever my body is touching said couch. I realize that sounds incredibly gross, but if you have swamp coolers then you know exactly what I'm talking about. It's not gross, it's life. And life, my friends, tends to be gross. (Another pillow ready to be stitched with that little gem of truth..I'm taking orders...only $19.95 plus shipping and handling by cool air conditioned hands.)

Needless to say, I love our central air. I believe I may be bragging about it throughout the summer unless it breaks. And then I'll cry and whine about that. Either way, more posts. :)

Pic Pile

Easter 2009

My kids cheesin' it for the camera. Huh, just noticed the fantastic lamp stand of boxes. May be time to move those suckers. :)

Showing off their cute Easter clothes. I love the fact that Abby is holding onto Megan's shoulders--about 1/2 second after this picture was taken Megan was booking it down the hallway.

Randomness

Meg posing for the camera with yet again, another messy face. I thought about lying and saying it's all her dad's fault, but really, I'm just to lazy to wash her face 10 billion times a day. So messy it is!

Meg, posing AGAIN for the camera, this time with some sexy moon boots she borrowed from Heidi's son Tyler. Sorry, they are not sexy moon boots, they are studly man snow boots. My mistake.

Meg & Tanner (aka the Tan-man) and their daily sungazing out the front window during the two and a half weeks Sarah was in New York. They seriously did this every morning for about 10-15 minutes. They are so goofy.

Up close & personal with the Tan-man.